Dr. M: Day 11--Your First Manga Crush

Okay, first, there is something you should know. I am not a romantic. In fact, I am pretty much the opposite of a romantic. Wine and bubblebaths and grand sweeping gestures seem silly and insincere to me. I'm less likely to swoon than to laugh at those kinds of romantic things. I hate the phrase "make love" because it gives me the gross-outs. I think people should be honest, and have a hard, crunchy shell...I am not an easy person to love. And I'm okay with that. I do love people, wholly and fully and with all of my twisted little soul, but I don't do romance, and I'm more likely to tell someone to "suck it up and act like they own a pair" than sugar-coat things. That's not great, because sometimes we need a little sugar, sugar boogers (that's a term of endearment...it's about as cutey-fu-fu as I get).

So, it will come as no surprise that I not only don't mind mean, curmudgeonly characters...I kind of love them.

My first manga crush was Eiri Yuki from Gravitation, the most unlikely and unromantic romance novelist ever.

He's cruel, and honest, and altogether my type of person.

He's so deliciously MEAN! 

Here's Eiri Yuki in typical jerk-mode, explaining why he's annoyed with his lover Shuichi:

"You're boring when you're not acting stupid...but you're even worse when you're trying too hard. If you want to get all emotional, then go someplace else. Take some Ritalin. I don't want to hear you bitch and moan." ("Track 7").

Yes, it's harsh, but isn't heartless. In his defense Shuichi is annoying as all get out and should take some Ritalin.

And as he says later, "Get over it, this is just the way I profess my love" ("Track 54"). Some of us don't express our love in standard ways, but it doesn't mean I don't care. It means I can be myself with the people I love. I can call them crap-weasels if I want because I love them.

And it isn't like Eiri Yuki can't be kind, I mean he did threaten to kick anyone's ass who kidnapped his boyfriend without permission. Of course, that's after he told his boyfriend he was a no-talent hack and a moron chimp.

You take the good and the bad, I guess? Love hurts. It hurts even worse when you're with an unromantic cad, but we don't really mean to be unromantic...we just think it's gross. So, like Eiri Yuki, when I call someone a moron chimp, I do it out of love. It might be narcissistic to fall for a character too much like me, but that's another issue I have to deal with. I leave you with these parting words of love from Yuki (romance novelist...remember?):

"When you're that happy, I just want to smack you." ("Track 32")...yup. That's about right.

The heart wants what it wants!
What does it want?
Blood mostly!
ROMANCE!